Should My Aspiring Content Creator Pal Cease Exploiting People for Content?

One Side: One Friend's Perspective

At times she films me while I’m eating. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it feels like a jumpscare.

My best friend of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it strains our friendship.

She is an extrovert, she feels the need to record everything all the time. When we eat out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and takes photos with the flash on, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when strangers see her performing for the camera – I experience secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but Marielle is trying to be. She makes video blogs about city life, a day in her life, and her styling career. Her content is good, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes she films me while I’m eating, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her Instagram afterwards, and it comes like a jumpscare: I’ll have no makeup on, making a strange expression or photographed mid-bite. It’s uncomfortable.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to record her at inopportune moments. Sometimes I'm in conversation to another person, or we're simply spending time in the street. I feel like our friendship has transformed into me being her free crew. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my discomfort about this arrangement, she brushed it off. She’s taken me to several brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn’t make up for all the energy I spend assisting her make content.

I appreciate that Marielle has supported me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don’t feel she’s fake or inauthentic, but sometimes I feel that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her channel.

She will say, “OK, look happy!” and film me laughing with another. It’s so silly. It's crucial her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I love spending time with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being filmed, edited, or shared for an audience. I am not a accessory for her Instagram.

The Other Side: Marielle

I want Beth to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online allows me to express myself and connect with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your passions. I look up to people on TikTok who execute that aesthetic of casual, DIY content creation.

Creating content is my version of engaging with life: observing the details, sharing them with an viewership that appreciates the art behind it. It's never my aim to make Beth uncomfortable. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, providing her a opportunity to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not leverage, it’s just being realistic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see what the content we create together can get us: an opening. I know not everyone enjoys being on camera, but often unplanned moments is what makes material authentic. Being recorded occasionally is an inherent aspect of being my companion. I'd remove anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my personal filmmaker, but companions help each other in small ways. I thought filming a short video now and then would be fun for her. Creativity thrives in collaboration, and having my friend around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I would never deliberately embarrass her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I document our shared experiences.

I value Beth’s friendship deeply and want to avoid content creation to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to find middle ground: like requesting permission before recording, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about control, it’s about expressing my perspective while still considering hers. Obviously making content is not a replacement for genuine friendship: it’s just part of how I live my life and I desire her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

The Jury: Reader Opinions

Is it right for her to stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend film you. I get that it's her job, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. With the uncertain future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something professionally, you can’t ask your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn’t mean everyone around her is content. She must to honor Beth’s privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love making content and displaying her life publicly, but it isn't for everybody. It was kind she has assisted Beth’s career, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so hold on to that and make sure it’s the priority in your relationship. Create some authentic memories, where true emotions are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more secrecy than it appears.
One opinion, 53

She seems to be neither present nor genuine when she’s with Beth – she’s working. Both seem unsure as to what’s reasonable. The answer lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing clear limits around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their friendship?